Wednesday, September 15, 2010

A Real Life Example of Why I Made the Switch to Collaborative


Here's a prime example of the kinds of emotions that led me to change my divorce practice to Divorce Mediation and Collaborative Divorce -----

I was in a grocery store and I was approached by a man I did not know but who knew me. He called me by my first name, and when I acknowledged him, he said, ”Your Tracy Timby,” an
d went on to say that I had written some lies about him. By his side was his 7 year old daughter who looked understandably confused. I asked him in what context I wrote about him, and when he told me his name, I realized that he was the soon-to-be-ex of one of my litigation clients.I also realized that I was not allowed to talk to him because he had an attorney (that's one of those rules we attorneys have to follow - no "ex parte" communication).

I told him I couldn’t talk to him without his attorney being present. He decided to continue, however, and went on to point to his daughter and say "Look at her…this is who you are hurting". Ironic, huh? He put his child in the middle of a conversation about his divorce during the time he is supposed to spend with her...and then purposely makes her the center of his anger!

I haven't blogged much about my practice this past 10 days or so because I was trying to figure out this INSANITY. Then, I realized what got me into this area of law in the first place...it needed good guys. The more the word spreads about alternatives to litigated divorce, the less grocery store incidents we will have. The people I work with in alternative divorces are sad, yes. Bitter, maybe...but ultimately thankful that they were able to work out the divorce while minimizing the trauma to themselves and their children.


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